Do birds of a feather flock together, or do opposites attract? And what makes a great date for different types? As for Introverts, a quiet and intimate dinner for two would float their boat, but you might not get a second date if you ended up in the front row of a comedy club…. A potential conversation-stopper for the two types is around details. While for the Sensor, the facts and details of a story are very important as well as the order things happened in , an Intuitive may find these irrelevant and annoyingly tedious. Sensors might enjoy sloshing wine about pretending to know the difference between a Riesling and a Gewurtztraminer; for Intuitives, how about a murder mystery party where Reina Terra is suspected of killing Maria Von Schnapps with an electrified trouser press? Thinking types are logical in their approach to intimacy. Feeling types simply want to be intimate — full stop!
6 Marriage “Operating Systems”
Deep thinkers are obsessed with things that look beautiful and make sense. People who think deeply understand that simply loving someone is not enough to sustain a relationship, and therein breeds the problem. This leads them to frequently over-analyze personality traits, patterns and behaviors with an unnecessary amount of neuroticism. People who think deeply get their joy from… thinking deeply. They have a hard time simply feeling something to feel it, or enjoying something without understanding some kind of profound meaning behind it.
Feelers will also appreciate a Thinker’s ability to help them alter their views and allow for a more objective view when it is necessary, which can help the Feeler.
Would you like to be an emotional genius? Now, you can. Here are four ways you can raise your EQ. Thinkers makes decisions primarily with their head logic ; Feelers make choices mainly with their heart emotions. Although you may do both, chances are, you are stronger in one area. Look for signs of an emotionally intelligent guy.
Understanding Temperaments: Thinkers and Feelers.
Everyone relaxes differently. The best solution? Respect differences. Let the introvert relax solo, while the extrovert calls a pal. Linden , an expert in personality type and communication style. Certain types like sticking to a distinct plan; others feel anxious and boxed-in if everything ‘ s on a calendar.
It’s not that Thinkers have no feelings or that Feelers are incapable of being logical. MBTI and Marriage: When Thinkers Marry Feelers of friendship and dating beforehand along with several crises that we’ve dealt with.
Now I am quietly waiting for the catastrophe of my personality to seem beautiful again, and interesting, and modern. An unprecedented history of the personality test conceived a century ago by a mother and her daughter—fiction writers with no formal training in psychology—and how it insinuated itself into our boardrooms, classrooms, and beyond.
The Myers-Briggs Type Indicator is the most popular personality test in the world. It is used regularly by Fortune companies, universities, hospitals, churches, and the military. Its language of personality types—extraverts vs. How did Myers-Briggs, a homegrown multiple choice questionnaire, infiltrate our workplaces, our relationships, our Internet, our lives? First conceived in the s by the mother-daughter team of Katherine Briggs and Isabel Briggs Myers, a pair of devoted homemakers, novelists, and amateur psychoanalysts, Myers-Briggs was designed to bring the gospel of Carl Jung to the masses.
How to Be An Emotional Genius: Get Straight A’s in Your Love Life
By Dr. Thinkers T and feelers F have a longstanding disagreement regarding the best approach for dealing with emotions. For instance, feelings of sadness or depression are often attended by a reduction of energy, vitality, and productivity. Thinkers may see low feelings as real threats to their power and potency, and ergo best avoided whenever possible.
Of course, insofar as its aftermath entails feelings of guilt and shame, the net energetic effect may be negative rather than positive. Hence, many thinkers will conclude that even feelings of anger should be eschewed or ignored.
Why Every Relationship Should Have One ‘Thinker’ And One ‘Feeler · Thinkers focus on the hard facts of the relationship; feelers focus on gut.
It was good to hear others affirm that sometimes you just have to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Rebecca Tredway Photography. Thinkers have it rough, too! The truth is, we only ever experience life from behind our own two eyeballs. It must be hard to have all those emotions all the time! I feel like you could fit the extent of my emotions into a thimble and some of my sisters need a bucket.
So for my friend Renae and any of the rest of you feelers I wanted to explain how it feels to be a thinker. What are the struggles? The strengths? I cry at moving songs, I feel joyful when my kids accomplish major milestones like playing independently for five minutes. I laugh. A lot. I am not without emotions, but I also rarely have the feeling that my emotions are controlling me or that they are difficult to manage.
Why Every Relationship Should Have One ‘Thinker’ And One ‘Feeler’
People are random and unpredictable. We spend our lives trying to figure them out, to calculate their moves and guess their feelings. Yet, while there will always be a sense of mystery, there are consistencies in the randomness of human behavior. According to the Myers—Briggs Type Indicator MBTI , a questionnaire designed to indicate psychological preferences in how people perceive the world and make decisions, there are two rational approaches to how human beings make decisions: being a thinker and being a feeler.
Some of us are all about objectivity, and some are all about subjectivity.
Are you in a relationship with one of the world’s deep feelers, thinkers, and processors? By Jenn Granneman /; Love and Dating /; February 12,
We will explain these traits and help you know what to do when your operating systems clash! An internal processor makes decisions and sorts through facts and feelings in their head. An external processor makes decisions and sorts through facts and feelings in conversations. As an internal processor, I Jill have found there are some benefits to sharing my thoughts and feelings when making a decision.
It keeps us talking and that deepens intimacy. Jill is an introvert, and she loves being alone.
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Now we are going to look at two different ways of making decisions. We just lean one way or the other when it comes to making decisions. Some of us decide with the head, some with the heart. How do you decide? More with the head or heart?
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This is particularly true when the situation is difficult and related to work or our private lives. Some people theorize that couples whose views and behaviors differ significantly from each other actually fare better when facing difficulties together. The former make decisions based upon logic and objective truth, and after weighing up all the options thoroughly, whereas the latter make decisions based on their feelings, intuition and on the basis of how the decision they make would affect them and those around them.
Some people believe that an ideal couple consists of a Thinker and a Feeler, because they will try and solve a problem using completely different approaches to each other. Here are 8 reasons to back up this notion: 1. Thinkers count on facts. Feelers take note of emotions. When a relationship is about to commence, a Thinker will take in all the hard facts about the other individual, such as social status, financial clout, their ability to devote free time to the relationship, and so on.
Another consideration made by the Thinker is whether there is actually a necessity for a relationship in his or her life at that point in time.
The Turbulent Personality: Don’t Worry, Be Happy?
Today at our staff bonding day, one of my coworkers ran a great activity involving our Myers-Briggs personality assessments in regards to communication. As an introverted thinker, I found the activity to be really helpful. First we broke into two groups—introverts and extroverts—and brainstormed helpful and unhelpful communication tactics. Needless to say, one group was louder than the other!
We then reconvened to chat about the differences and find solutions for working with the opposite group.
As a thinker, I try to consider the emotions of my partner and explain the logic of my thinking in a way that isn’t too robotic. My partner, as the feeler, has come to an.
When analyzing Myers-Briggs relationships, this set of preferences includes those with the Thinking preference on one end and those with the Feeling preference on the opposing end. Thinkers are logical and practical, and they formulate their thoughts based on facts and reason, regardless of whether their decisions or thoughts seem unrealistic to others.
Interestingly, this is not the case with romantic or intimate relationships, as individuals will often find themselves attracted to their opposites. Thinking Types are also attracted to Feeling Types inherently encouraging and nurturing persona. Thinkers enjoy when Feelers challenge them to open up more or to proactively become more sympathetic and perceptive, and Thinkers will often find themselves feeling more comfortable about sharing their inner thoughts and feelings with their opposite, alleviating some of the inner issues that a Thinker may battle with because of their analytically programmed mind.
When a relationship begins to form between a Thinker and a Feeler, each individual is very aware of their own shortcomings and behaviors that may irk their partner, and they do their best to modify their behavior so that they may seem more desirable. The most common and substantial issue that often arises between Thinking and Feeling couples is a lack of verbal or physical appreciation, often with one individual desiring a great deal of this interaction and the other not seeing the importance of it.
The behavioral tendencies of Feeling and Thinking Personality Types can clash in the way they communicate their feelings. On the other hand, Thinking Types are not as outwardly intimate as Feelers, and often will neglect to put into words or actions how greatly they feel for their partner. This can cause the Feeling Type to feel as though their emotions and love are not reciprocated. The Feeler may receive some feedback from the Thinking Type regarding their behavior, though it is often a negative comment regarding an imperfection the Thinking Type sees in the Feeler.
An additional area of conflict in a Thinking-Feeling Personality Type relationship arises from how each individual discusses issues or advice with his or her partner.
What If Your Date Is Just Not Your “Type”?
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Hence, many will rely on certain catalysts—be it dating, music, movies, or fantasy—to ignite these feelings. Thinkers are also inclined to use emotional intensity as.
INTJs believe in constant growth in relationships, and strive for independence for themselves and their mates. They are constantly embarking on “fix-up” projects to improve the overall quality of their lives and relationships. They take their commitments seriously, but are open to redefining their vows, if they see something which may prove to be an improvement over the existing understanding. INTJs are not likely to be “touchy-feely” and overly affirming with their mates or children, and may at times be somewhat insensitive to their emotional needs.
However, INTJs are in general extremely capable and intelligent individuals who strive to always be their best, and be moving in a positive direction. If they apply these basic goals to their personal relationships, they are likely to enjoy happy and healthy interaction with their families and friends. They constantly scan their environment for new ideas and theories which they can turn into plans and structures. Sometimes, what they see and understand intuitively within themselves is more pure and “perfect” than the reality of a close personal relationship.
INTJs may have a problem reconciling their reality with their fantasy. INTJs are not naturally in tune with their own feelings, or with what other people are feeling. They also have a tendency to believe that they are always right. While their self-confidence and esteem is attractive, their lack of sensitivity to others can be a problem if it causes them to inadvertantly hurt their partner’s feelings.
If this is a problem for an INTJ, they should remember to sometimes let their mate be the one who is right, and to try to be aware of the emotional effect that your words have upon them.